At exactly this time last week Ana was sending me off to the train station in Sevilla - I can’t believe I’ve already been here for a whole week! What’s amazing is how easily and quickly this family has adopted me into their home and how compatible everything is for the most part. I spend the days with the kids communicating in spanglish (it’s a little harder to gain their trust/ be fun, it’s coming along slowly). The only thing is that I have been weirdly exhausted, I sleep for so many hours and I feel like I have a constant fever even though my sore throat has gone away. I don’t know what could possibly be wrong with me but it suckkkssss. I also find it interesting how both Ana and Olga told me that cold water is bad for the throat. This is mildly ironic because they both smoke and Olga owns a fryalator for her kitchen AND uses a non-stick pan with the bottom torn to shreds AND eats artificial sweetener. But beware of that cold water? Maybe that’s why I’ve been so tired. Ahh, yes, too much cold water. I also find it bothersome how they both would complain that I eat nothing. Olga eats about 2/3 of the portion that I do, minus dessert. And continues to comment that I eat nothing. And her husband does too! He was like, oh Emily’s on a diet haha. I was just like. What.
OH GOD, I have forgotten HONG. This is so important. An ode to all of the middle-aged asian men I have ever known, and to all of the humor that they have brought to the world. So the language classes at CLIC had lots of people of different ages and nationalities, including middle-aged, Korean Hong. I was introduced to that which makes Hong Hong on his second day when the teacher randomly picked him to write a soccer vocabulary list (that we had had for homework) on the board and to describe the words. It took half of the class. In a thick Korean accent, but in spanish “um. Uhhh. Um. Linea. Linea. Um. Uhhhh. Linea.” Draws a line on the board. “linea. Ummmmm. Linea.”
Professor “they understand Hong, please continue.”
“uh. Um. Linea.”
“YES HONG.”
Once we watched a movie and had to describe the characters. The father was an average middle-aged man and hong wouldn’t shut up about him being guapo. He also called the wife sexy like 8 times. It was awk.
We also talked about relationships one day and he told the class how it wouldn’t be okay with him for his girlfriend to have friends that were boys. Or to take a vacation without him. Okay Hong.
Hong was quite the star of the class, and had us all in giggles each day. However, what made it that much funnier was the lack of tolerance that another student, Jeff (American college student), had for him. One of my favorite activities during one of Hong’s episodes was to look over at Jeff. What a face. It was always such disbelief. It was so much what we were all thinking – what the fuck you crazy fuck – but just straight up, and without a sense of humor about it. HILARIOUS to watch the two.
So then later that week our conversation teacher came up with a terrific activity. We would role play parents and children and would have to have conversations with one another. Jeff was my “husband,” and we were lucky enough to experience Hong as our child.
Hong: “Uh. Ummm. Uh. Can I get a piercing? Umm. Uh. Um. Uhhhhh. In my belly button?”
Jeff: utter disbelief / disgust. “What do you want???”
Hong: “Uh. Ummmm. Uh. Piercing. Bellybutton. Umm. Uh.”
Jeff: “what?? Do you like other men? Are you gay??”
Hong: “uh. Ummm. Uh.um. cool. Very cool. Um. Uh.”
And then I died. I was crying. In class. It was too much. He wanted a tattoo as well.
So much has been lost through this description, but God. If you could have been there. If only you could have experienced Hong.
But yea. I’ve watched a lot of TV. A lot of Spanish dubbed anime. (We watched the same five shows 2 days in a row – exactly the same). Have you ever seen the show “Lazy Town?” If that isn’t the most homo-erotic children’s show I have ever seen, I don’t know what is. I’d say it blows spongebob right out of the water.
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